People tell you that your second kid is going to be easier than the first. Angelo was a pretty good baby. So when those two pink lines appeared on the test, I figured–I got this.This is going to be a piece of cake!Yeah, until they did the ultrasound and said,“Congratulations, it’s a girl!”I immediately had this vision of walking her down the aisle at a church on her wedding day. My next vision was of me punching the mystery groom in the face and yelling about my baby girl.
Oh, man. I know nothing about girls.Absolutely nothing. I grew up with three brothers. Girls kind of terrified me my whole life.I’m not even sure how I got my wife to marry me. After knowing her for 10 years, she is still a complete mystery to me sometimes.
Then Selena was born and that protective dad instinct kicked in hard. She is the exact opposite of her brother in so many ways.It’s terrifying. She’s three years old and already all the little boys around here know her name.She’s very social.She knows everybody and she wants to help everybody.That’s great, but as a dad, I am always looking at the longview of things.So I’m seeing her in high school where all the boys know her name and she’s nice to everybody, and she’s bringing these stray boys home who can’t get their crap together.Sheisn’t going to see the kinds of things that I know boys think (because I was one, and that really, really bugs me now).
I feel like we almost have it easy right now.She’s not really into pink or flowers or anything like that. The thing she was most in the world is a bike that’s as fast as her brother’s.The only thing is her hair. She is girly over her hair. I don’t know how to braid itand I even brush it wrong.I didn’t know there was a wrong way to brush hair, but there must be because she gets so mad at me.I’m straight up terrified of the moment she asks me where babies come from. I just better not be the one that has to take her to the store to buy any sort of feminine related thing. Even prom dresses.As far as I’m concerned, she is never going to prom. She’s just not going to date, ever. We’ll meet a nice boy at church and she will see him on Sundays and then one Sunday they will just get married and that’ll be that. They will have separate bedrooms and maybe adopt me a grandchild. I think I could live with that. But she’s not dating.There’s none of that. I’m not gonna have some boy that I don’t know drive up to the house in his pathetic jalopy and say he’s taking Selena on a date.Like heck you are.Over my dead body.
Angelo, I can talk to. I can be like,“Look, this is how you treat a woman. This is how you handle yourself. This is how you make decisions,” and that’s it.I can start doing that now so by the time he is interested in girls he is already a gentleman. But girls? Little girls become young girls who become women and that scares me to death. My wife is going to laugh at this post but I wanted other dads to know. Raising girls is hard.